Moons over My Hammy

bienvenido a my hammy.

I'm not going to even pretend for 1 single minute that i will be able to write a blog entry that has any 'flow' or 'logical transitions' or 'complete sentences.' not that that's ever been my specialty. but today is especially bad.

AMENDMENTS

In my last post, i mentioned that i broke my ipod. well turns out i'm a GENIUS and i fixed it all by myself. (then i dropped it that night and cracked the screen-- but it works. so you should save your money for other gifts for me.) FYI i also broke my Ipod about 2 weeks ago, and matt fixed it. maybe i should just start carrying around a diskman again. i never broke that mofo.

In a post i made a in January when i was talking about relating to every song i heard on the radio i made the following statement "'He just smiled and gave me a vegemite sandwich.' Ok. this one i don't really understand let alone relate to, but i sure do like it." WELL. guess who not only knows what a vegemite sandwich is, but actually ate one?!?!? after having a "he" smile and give it to me? that's right I DID. thanks, Australians!

NEW DISCOVERIES
these things i've known deep down for a while, but am ready to go fully accept as part of ME and move on. here's my public announcement:

I can't eat pretzels or almonds with out choking on them. i need to be drinking water as i eat them. or, you know, not eat them, but that seems silly. Yes, i did just announce on a public blog that i choke on nuts. don't worry about it.

I've also come to terms with the fact that i simply need to be everyone's favorite all the time. I don't know where this complex started. Probably early in life when i was undoubtedly the favorite child or maybe its because i've always been the best at everything i do, so i deserve it. Its not like i'm selfish or stuck up. i just know that i am the prettiest and funniest and smartest and coolest and should be treated as such. no big deal.

i really hate painting my toe nails, yet i hate them being naked, and i hate paying for a pedicure. as you can see, this leaves me in quite a predicament. PEDIcament. i'm gonna have to suck it up and paint them because its driving me crazy. but i'm really dreading it. Yes. this is my subtle way of inviting you over to my apt to paint my toe nails.

ELLIS my most beloved brit is coming to visit me today!!!. next weekend i'm going to the beach with the boys- unfortunately not with the beach boys, but i'll make it work. the weekend after i get to go home for Caitlin's wedding and to play with the TWO babies my mom has in foster care right now. if i can just make it through the next 9 days of working all the GD time, its gonna be gravy. Mosquitoes say what? (katie don't worry... its totally catching on).

'venezuelan' does not look like a word. don't even try to argue that it does.

I'm gonna make myself stop writing now. Its either that, or i have to start judging all of you for continuing to read the shit i put on this blog. I'd rather maintain at least a little respect for you. (see how nice i am! this is why i should be your favorite.)

"I'm working so i won't have to try so hard"

i've been bad at blogging lately. i'm sorry to let you down. turns out working 2 jobs sucks exponentially, logarithmically and aerodynamically more that working one-- according to the dewey decimal system.

also, nothing exciting has happened on the train. i haven't seen my roommates in what seems like weeks. i don't really go out anymore, because i've been working 10 hour days on saturdays, which ruins my friday night and my saturday. oh, and cus i'm old and lame and poor. BUT. i no longer work saturdays, and feel it is time to start making my own luck.

ideas.

1.) Get some sort of 'baby bump' to wear to bars. binge drink, maybe pick up smoking. see what people say. (I will also wear this baby bump on the train so people have to give me their seat.)
2.) Start sitting right next to people on trains/buses that are completely empty.
3.) Start offering strangers gum/mints/fruit snacks as i'm eating them. i think its the polite thing to do.
4.) greet perfect strangers as if i know them. "Hey man! how have you been? haven't seen you in years!" See how many people play along. i've actually done this on accident before. He replied "i don't think i know you" which was when i realized- no. no he did not. but i just said "Uh... i think you do." and walked away. let him think he's the crazy one.

i think my parents would be proud of me for setting goals with my life.

thats really all i gots. pathetic, i know.

OH also i broke my ipod. so someone should buy me a new one. ready, set, GO!

PS when you do a google image search for "the strokes 'i'm working so i don't have to try so hard'" this is what comes up: